A new year, a new door opens.

Rushing this because I wanna do this befor the year ends.

2011 has been a year of crazy ups and downs - a true emotional rollercoaster for me. From the passing of loved ones, to completing conscription, to even being in close vicinity to idol stars. I'd rather look back and remember on the positive but that's impossible. Without the downs in my life, I wouldn't cherish what I have.

As the drums beat, ushering in the new year, let us remember and reflect how 2011 has been a year of Change. From the Arab Spring to the passing of several dictators. Lives were lost in the hopes of a better future.

They say 2012 will bring the apocalypse and many people are so worried. Why do so? Realise that you rarely get a second chance in life. Live life fully. Don't make excuses. Do it - it's what I'm going to force myself to do. No use worrying and overthinking. One step at a time.

I just want to thank everyone for being there for me in 2011, teaching and guiding me and accompanying me on my journey. Thank you for everything.

May this coming new year bring all of us closer (hopefully). May it be a better year of greater acceptance and recognition, of sweeping positive changes for the better, a year of breakthroughs, a year for reconciliations, a year where dreams and hopes get fulfilled. May 2012 be a blessed year for everyone.

Rmb, I'm at DW now. kekeke.


Poem: Forget Him

Forget Him.

Forget his name, forget his face
Forget his kiss, his warm embrace
Forget the love that you once knew
Remember he has someone new
Forget him as they play your song
Remember how you cried all night long
Forget how close you two once were
Remember he has chosen her
Forget you memorized his walk
Forget the way he used to talk
Forget the things he used to say
Remember he has gone away
Forget his laugh, forget his grin
Forget the dimples on his chin
Forget the way he held you tight
Remember he's with her tonight
Forget the time that went so fast
Forget the love that moved, it's past
Forget he said he'd leave you never
Remember that he's gone forever
Forget him.

- Author Unknown


Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?

Wrote a short piece after I found out about Any Winehouse. I guess you only appreciate someone only when they're gone - I cannot help but think how true that is. She had an amazing gift and she shared her light with the world. Thank you Amy Winehouse. Rest in Peace wherever you wish to be.

Title: Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?
Rating: R
Summary: A slice of a dying star's final moments.
Warning: Mentions of drug use, vulgarities.
Author's Note: The following story unravelled as I heard Amy Winehouse's tracks and covers. Inspired by the lady herself but not really based on her. Don't sue but i will if you plagiarize. Lol. Just read and enjoy. Leave a review if you can please? Thank you!

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“나 가거든” (If I leave)

Title: “나 가거든” (If I leave)
Inspired by: You've Fallen for Me Episode 3
Pairing: Kiyeong/Soomyung
Rating: R
Summary: Sometimes you gotta do what you've gotta do. Unbetaed as usual.
Warnings: Some vulgarities, m/m, mentions of sex but non-graphic! Rated R to be on the safe side.
A/N: Can someone just review this? It's been what? 2 years of non-writing and then this strikes. I could barely sleep.
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Starting to wonder if I need to be evaluated...

Today, went out with a friend I met during my medic course. We talked about cases, bitched about work, shared about our future and our goals before we finish our dang conscription. Perhaps it's telling that when we were talking about past friendships, I shared this:

"Sometimes I feel like I'm a piece of driftwood. When the tides of time comes, I move off - sometimes leaving a part of me, othertimes, taking a part of others with me but I continue to move on. I can barely stay stuck."

And I guess it is true. Even later, when we met up with the whole group, I feel so damn fucking alienated (what's new?). And while they were laughing, I was contemplating how to disappear. And briefly toyed with the idea of well...going for eternity via shot to the head; which thankfully I have no access for. I am rather impulsive. Let's put it that way - not the first time the idea has struck me.

I wonder if I'm back to being the depressive bag that I was back when I was 12 or maybe it's just that time of the month or perhaps it's because the super moon coming or something. *shrugs*

I need to stop thinking too much as well. But seriously, I think it's doable. The whole disappearing thing. I'm going to experiment with it - figure out if anyone realised. I highly doubt it. I can just switch my phone off, delete my online persona. But at the same time, I don't want it to be permanent. More temporal. Weird huh? If I were to deactivate my emails, can I reactivate them back? What about facebook? Hmm...

(no subject)


2010's finally gone and I'm hoping this new year's going to be a better year ahead for me. I've definitely been neglecting my lj, my f-list and I haven't been writing anything at all for months now. I'm not going to declare my new year's resolution (I have none- preemptive measure and all) but I really cannot wait for my next day off so I can actually sleep in. Shall update with a proper post then hopefully.


Lest anyone thinks I'm dead, I've just been a tad busy. Shall update when I can find the time to actually think my words through. God, Life hasn't been a bed of roses lately. Mayhaps my spending habits are largely to blame. Which is why I've gotten my 2011 resolution ready!

AFTER SS3, no more showcases/concerts. No matter what. (exceptions: if dbsk gets back together as 5, if ss501 comes as a set...otherwise no. Just no.)

I guess it still needs some finetuning here and there. Oh and today's world aid's day. pls dun be ignorant - they are people with feelings too.

That is all for now.